I am so busy at work right now, but I have SO MANY MANY THOUGHTS. I won’t have time to get them all down. But please, ask me anything and I will respond as soon as I can!
I am 17 years removed from my stint as an NFL Cheerleader and so much of what you have written is spot on. That said, a lot of these women really do love to dance and the dance part is actually very challenging! Former college cheerleaders do not tryout for NFL squads because they don’t have the dance skills. I minored in classical dance in college and I still was one of the weaker dancers on the team.
Absolutely do not wish to diminish the dance part of the equation — it's just not the type of dance that electrifies me *personally* (and I also think the styles of dance most of them do outside of pom/cheer are more difficult, like Reese and ballroom or Charlie in what seems to be a sort of modern/jazz?)
I was a little disappointed with this piece and some of the comments here. Please read Aubrey's comment below, they express my feelings well. I feel like there is a lot of unnecessary gawking and even objectification of these women for living a lifestyle so different from our own instead of taking them seriously. Sure, they may be raised to value a certain type of femininity. And the Cowboys mistreat the cheerleaders by not paying them well or providing them with great resources. But all of them (including Reese) joined this organization for a reason. Perhaps you delve more into this in the podcast.
I agree. I grew up in Texas, and although I have a LOT to criticize about this culture, I feel really uncomfortable by the outside liberal gaze here. I'm still sitting with my split and complicated feelings, and may not articulate them well. So apologies in advance.
I worry that a lot of these criticisms are stemming from a place of cultural/religious bias first and foremost. These women are athletes and artists who have found a way to do what they love for PAY on a very high level for as long as possible. Do I have issues with the patriarchy and capitalism under which they are functioning? Yes of course. That's why I left. And I think it's worth our criticism. But I see a lot of criticisms on this thread that are just cultural eyerolls and judgments based on little information dressed up in fancy words. Would we have the same criticisms over ballerinas? Over WNBA players? Any other female led athletic or artistic endeavor that is physically demanding and also requires a discipline around diet and exercise either for the aesthetics or the athletic skills needed to play at the highest level? The jump splits are INSANE, but they are also really cool, and probably thrilling to do, and doesn't every sport fuck up your body somehow?
I have to admit, my first judgment of the costume fitting is the same, because yes I think it's perpetuates body image issues in women of COURSE. But, so do ballet, and gymnastics. And every single working actress I know who orders a salad instead of a burger and gets up at 5am for her barre class. Right? Ack it's so complicated.
It's also making me think of the incredibly smart, powerful women I grew up with in Texas who are religious and family/community centered, and often feel very ostracized by modern liberal feminism, even though they themselves want to be able to address the patriarchy within their cultures. When we approach a lot of very smart young women and begin with the eye roll first, (They're "EVANGELICAL" They "ACT SEXY BUT DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT SEX" (Um. What. Says who.) and THEN start to pat ourselves on the back because "Look! I found empathy for a religious person!" I worry.
I have a lot of anger towards evangelicals and purity culture. But I also know a lot of evangelicals who have been in long term monogamous relationships and who seem very sexually...happy? Satisfied? Who really love their partners and enjoy their physical relationship? I'm not in the bedroom with them, but I think it's weird that we assume sex with more people somehow leads to better quality of sex.
I grew up in Evangelical culture, in a place that's even more red than Texas. I was a cheerleader and loved it and deeply involved in the church and also loved it. I also lived in Texas for four years. I don't think these women are "bad" — I think, like a lot of women I grew up around and a lot of women I love, they are inculcated in ideologies that understand them, their bodies, and their purpose in incredibly narrow ways. Of course each of these women negotiate their own placement within those ideologies, and we see that onscreen. Women who want to do something exhilarating and athletic shouldn't have to accept the framework of only being able to do what you love if you're willing to put up with a whole bunch of patriarchal bullshit.
Hm. I agree that this particular culture has a lot to criticize, and rage against, but I think framing these college educated women as victims who have all been brainwashed and don’t know any better is condescending. (And I love your work! This is just pushing some buttons for me that I’m still figuring out for myself about a lot of the women I grew up with).
I probably disagree with many of these women on their social and political views, but I don’t know if that means I’m less inculcated than they are?
Some of them will probably look back at this chapter of their life someday as fucked up, and some will continue to cherish it, and some of them need therapy.
I would love to live in a world where the NFL doesn’t exist, much less DCC, BUT there’s a general “Oh these poor poor dumb women.” attitude in a lot of these messages that I side eye.
Amazing! I'd love to know more about the economics: while I wasn't surprised, the idea that the cheer squads are underpaid was a stark reminder that certain forms of labor and expertise and undervalued: particularly if they are performed by women. In your time in the NFL, were there any stirrings on squads to lobby for better pay and benefits?
Would also love to know what inspired you to audition, how being an NFL Cheerleader has influenced your view of the NFL, what it was like to apply your classical training to the squad dance routines, and what the relationships you formed with your cheer-peers look like today.
Re: pay and benefits. The NFL has been sued multiple times for violating wage laws since I cheered. Some NFL teams chose to disband their cheerleaders rather than pay them minimum wage! (People often do not realize not all NFL teams have cheerleaders. The cheerleaders are usually employed under the marketing department in NFL team operations, and some teams choose not to have them.)
When I cheered in 2007 we were paid $50 for games (which were 10 hour days). We practiced uncompensated for 8 hours per week and were required to do workouts on our own time on top of practices. We did many charity appearances that were unpaid (average about 2 per week). We had a sponsorship from a beer company that paid $50 per appearance, but those were not as frequent. Other than that we were provided “free” hair and makeup services and free tanning (ew). Those were touted as “enough” compensation, even though we were required to look a certain way and would not have been able to fulfill those requirements without the hair, makeup and tanning services. The team recognized the low pay was not enough to live on and they did not want us to be homeless and they didn’t provide health insurance, so we were required to have a full time job or be a full time student or mother to be on the squad. (We did have on full time mom of two on the team.). They didn’t really mean this, however, as we learned when halfway through the season one of the girls admitted she had dropped out of school secretly and therefore wasn’t meeting the requirement. She was given a pass (likely because she was one of the best looking girls and never had a weight issue).
We were told over and over it was a privilege to even be on the team, the NFL team could cut the whole squad at any time, you were just lucky to be there. This was objectively true, as the Bills ended up cutting their cheerleading team when they were sued over back wages. Also, we saw the hundreds of women who showed up for auditions every year and knew that our spot on a team of 35 was very precarious! If I didn’t want to work for a pittance, there were 300 women being sent home who would!
My classical dancing translated just fine to the NFL because dance is dance and classical training will set you up for a lot. What didn’t translate as well was my body type was more ballet-based. I was lithe and I was told multiple times I need more “shape.” That sounds like they mean boobs, but what they meant was six pack abs and defined arms. The boobs always took care of themselves with generous padding!
As far as the relationships formed, I struggled with forming close friendships because it was very stressful holding down a full time professional job (I was an accountant) and keeping up with all the practices, appearances, workouts, maintaining my weight (we had a range) and the aesthetic required (so much spray tanning!) and still have a social life. I am still friendly with most of the women I cheered with but we were never close friends. I think I was an anomaly in this regard as I chose to only cheer one year (for the reason AHP stayed at the beginning of this piece - I needed it to not become my identity) and I was one of a few women who had a serious full time career. Others had jobs waitressing or in retail that allowed a lot more flexibility and were maybe not quite as “full time.”
Anyway! Thank you for asking. This was one year of my life, but it is probably still one of the most defining things of my life, even though I have tried hard to not make it that way. I’m a lawyer now and I look at that experience in hindsight with a much different perspective. At the time I loved having an outlet to dance three times a week, and it’s definitely a cool story to tell people. Would I do it again? Probably. Would I encourage my daughters to do it? Probably not.
Thanks so much for sharing! Do you have a sense of NBA dancers are in a similar situation pay and responsibility wise? I've always wondered because I think the NBA dancers are amazing.
There was a LOT of crossover on my NFL team with NBA dancers. Many women had done both plus a third professional cheer time, such as LaCrosse. I have no idea what it’s like now, and certainly as a *league* the NBA telegraphs being more progressive than the NFL. I don’t know if that is true in practice or not with regard to how they treat their dancers.
I loved the shot of the kickline through the years at the end of the series; you can see how the technique has progressed over the years (although I noticed some bent knees at the beginning of their kicks which could be a function of lack of strength, training, or those damn cowboy boots). It’s a shame that the choreography hasn’t kept up with the talent. Of note, former classically trained dancer who also did kickline and pom in high school; not just speaking out of my butt. Haha
I wish we could also talk about the joy and pleasure these women get from their dancing. I went into the show expecting to hate watch it and was surprised to find how much these women just genuinely love dance — a field that's very narrow and hard to get into with very few opportunities to perform on a stage the size of a football field.
The women were incredibly smart while also being compassionate and supportive towards one another, an unusual storyline on a reality show about beautiful, competitive women. There were so many scenes of them helping one another out, cheering each other and supporting each other when someone got cut. It was so tender and it surprised me.
I think what they are sad about losing of course is the fading power of idealized female beauty, but also the companionship and passion of having achieved mastery in their field — an activity that recently has been shown as a more successful treatment of depression than some medications (maybe this has something to do with why they love it so much)
I would love a take that explores why we don't dance culturally anymore and why dance has been pushed aside as a feminine wile instead of a community generating, joyful thing to do and behold.
Another thought… professional dance is either elite and upper class, an art form reserved for those who can "appreciate it," working in entertainment most often in a supporting role or as a choreographer or as a dance educator. Not everyone feels comfortable in those spaces and the DCC (and the laker girls, etc) are decidedly more mainstream.
it's tempting to look down our noses at their taste and where they want to be, but maybe we should be careful about assuming they don't know their own minds and are acting and choosing this very brief (powerful, fun, community rich) opportunity purely because they've been trained by culture to do so.
I gather that dance is considered an acceptable outlet for young women in Texas. Look at Friday Night Lights, the television series, which had the three major young female characters each with her own dance interest. One was a cheerleader. One was a rally girl, possibly a more rambunctious sort of cheerleader. One was doing modern dance. I have some friends who grew up in Texas. She was a majorette, a practitioner of yet another kind of dance. He was in the Pershing Rifles, on the drill team. Since it involved guns, it was a form of dance suitable for boys.
Restrictive religious cultures often encourage dance as an outlet. For example, Salt Lake City is noted for its ballet company and other dance companies as well.
Totally agree with this! My sister is a dancer in possibly the least male gaze-y/sexualized form of dance (highland dance), and still faces a lot of the emotions that it seems these women face (from reading the piece, I haven't seen the show). Yes, these women may be told that their worth in terms of physical appearance will decline, but there is also the fact that generally speaking your body simply cannot sustain dancing on a high level beyond your 20s. When both self-worth and true love and passion are derived from a sport, having to face this inevitable decline is incredibly difficult and heartbreaking. I thought Challengers did an excellent job of showing this heartbreak through Zendaya's character, Tashi Duncan, and I think it's something that is not unique to dance but is perhaps exacerbated in dance by a lack of opportunities to pursue dance in the same way as you grow older—both due to the physical constraints of the body, and because there are fewer opportunities to take classes and perform in the same way.
YES! dance is a short career. Everyone knows ballet destroys your feet and creates eating disorders and is not welcoming if you’re not white and I’m pretty sure doesn’t exactly pay well.
Even so most ballerinas are broken hearted when they can’t continue and after watching these women, I was left feeling like what mattered to most of them above all was how they feel when they dance together and perform.
I think it’s a bit classist to pity the DCC as hapless victims of misogyny because they have long hair and do sexy dances in Barbie makeup.
after watching the show it certainly wasn’t my impression that these women were blowing their hips out so men would think they mattered.
A high school boy we knew - he's grown up now - joined the cheerleading squad as a mascot because he liked the way the cheerleaders stuck up for each other.
YES!! Dancing is so JOYFUL. I grew up in the '90s in a conservative evangelical household when swing dancing was popular — having a local dance hall to go to every Friday night with my friends was a defining feature of how I was able to socialize with boys without an over protective parent hovering nearby. It was pure joy — my boyfriend (the first boy who ever flirted with me) and his friends and my friends would meet there every friday and dance our hearts out. EVERYONE danced together — it wasn't sexual, it was physically exhilarating and it bonded us together deeply in a way that no other teen activity could. I loved how it made me feel desirable and girlish and so fully in my body — don't know how I would have gotten through high school without dance and I miss it to this day.
I have many thoughts, but one thing that stood out to me in this series was how unnecessarily hard the powers that be were making an already difficult thing for the DCC, aside from the laughable pay and ankle-wrecking cowboy boots. The endless unpaid hours spent doing elaborate hair and makeup for practices - why? In the summer, in Dallas! Your uniform is minutely fitted to you but you don't get to keep it as a souvenir after you retire. Their bus driver wasn't given security clearance for their own stadium grounds so had to defend his right to be there. It felt like contempt, like they constantly had to be reminded to not get too big for their britches (or booty shorts). I'm not American and didn't grow up in this culture, but I know that there's no way the Cowboys would have anywhere near the following they have without the DCC. It's like they can't be lifted up without being torn down, which I guess is the subtext of so much of this great analysis.
Yes. Especially with the “fueling yourself” topic as they are shamed for being two lbs over their uniform measurements but the team doesn’t even provide them dinners prepared by a professional who could ensure they were properly nourished for the energy expenditure of evening practices, as well as game days. Or send them home after practice with pre-made breakfast and lunch for the next day. The fact that they are losing sleep trying to do their own meal prep late at night while then being disciplined when they can’t kick perfectly the next day is insane. It makes the Jones family look like villains.
I didn't even think of this, but it's so true! It's like the Cowboys organization has figured out how to get maximum value - financial, reputational and cultural - while expending less than the bare minimum. The message is 'You're lucky to be here, there are a million 'girls' who can take your place, now show us how grateful you are.'
So well said, Aliana! They want DCC to be these elite athletes yet the women aren’t provided with a team nutritionist, physical trainers (I saw a few ankles being taped, but these women weren’t by and large being worked over by PTs), or mental health professionals. After Sophy’s groped DURING A GAME, Kelce (the cheerleader who was stalked a whose car was air tagged), clearly looks triggered. Yet, there’s no professional support offered. Also, how in a stadium which boasts 3k televisions, is there no feed on the cheerleaders?! It makes me furious.
Full disclosure that I am a fan of a rival football team, but the Jones family are absolutely villains. They don't even need to work hard at it, and at some point it seems like they're actually going out of their way to be as vile as possible just because they can.
As a lifelong Dallasite, Jerry Jones is the villain to us too. I know my dad has never forgiven him for firing Jimmy Johnson in the same way he's never forgiven Jane Fonda for that picture in Vietnam.
Something that blew my mind was that the women from out of town who made it to the final round were staying in that big hotel but didn’t get to eat breakfast. I think it was Charlie who was like, I just really want some eggs.
I would hope so too! I was just basing it on what the girls were saying about wanting proper breakfast and the collection of protein bars and fruit and stuff in their rooms.
The hair and makeup expectations are the most Southern part of the show. I grew up in Tennessee and it is absolutely expected that you have your hair done and makeup on for everything. It's a class thing. Being sweaty or having your hair messy? Were you raised in a barn? Don't you dare embarrass your mother by leaving the house looking unkempt! For my family who really did grow up in a trailer park, it was EVEN more important to always have your hair and make up done.
From the age of 13, I never left the house without mascara and brows done as a bare minimum, even for workouts. Until the pandemic. That's almost 30 years of doing my face before leaving the house.
Contempt, and a reminder that they don't actually have any power or control. It's to make them "grateful"--you're being "given" this. But simultaneously, you have to work nonstop to "earn" it.
I will say that I believe that WHAT AM I … ? page also had the word "Courtesy" at the top and it was explaining what courtesy is, although I also thought initially that it was about the DCC members themselves.
It's still a bit weird and feels like it was written in the 1950s. Speaking of which, my mom was a flight attendant in the Catch Me If You Can era and her handbook felt similar. Be pretty! But also don't look slutty or fat! (They were weighed every week.)
What I loved about the show is how kind the women (I wrote "girls" and corrected myself) were to each other, despite being competitors. I believe it was genuine and I appreciated that this didn't have the usual "I'm not here to make friends" vibe of reality shows. They were, in fact, here to make friends because they were mostly sacrificing everything else to be here.
Victoria broke my heart. She seems so lively and sweet but just so...sad. It's like the DCC broke her but I'm rooting for her.
And aallll the coaches' criticism of the perfectly lovely redhead's (Charlie?) face made me want to scream. They talked like she was some hideous creature sometimes.
Don't even get me started on Charlotte Jones' little speech about pay. I told my daughter that if you substituted "football" in for "dance" in that speech and suggested no one get paid because they love football so much, men would lose their minds.
VICTORIA! No one deserves to feel that way about themselves and I am sure that whatever has created that mindset for her goes way deeper than her wanting redemption through the DCC. And Charlotte Jones can get fucked. And the racism!!
Yes, thank you, I was going to say this as well because it was a misinterpretation in the original Atlantic article that is (understandably!) being repeated here. It's a very 1950's-ish explanation of what "courtesy" is as a virtue. Would they ideally like the DCC members to be sexy AI assistants, no question they do, but there is not actually a page in the handbook telling them to be "a little thing with big meaning".
Thanks for flagging the "courtesy" conclusion of the quote--that was also my understanding, but I'm having trouble tracing back to *where* I saw it. But I think the a distinction between answering the "what am I" question with "courtesy" rather than "a DCC " is an important one.
I think it was meant to be a cutesy kind of riddle of a definition, with "Courtesy" asking "What am I?" but the fact that we're all so confused says something.
I froze the frame to take a look but my interpretation could be wrong. Maybe it's posted somewhere.
Agree. The confusion also tells us something about ourselves--I could completely believe that am organization like DCC would say something like that to these athletes.
The NCAA was just recently forced to start paying the football players at the heart of the multibillion dollar college football industry. Of course, doing well at college football might get a player a lucrative slot in an NFL team.
I saw this show as a masterclass in how to exploit and control women, financially and otherwise. The DCC leaders (who may not even realize the extent to which they are complicit in exploiting their cheerleaders — a whole other topic!) have created a system where these women must exhaust themselves (physically, financially…) to attain a semblance of societal power that is then taken away from them every single year. (The whole thing about turning in their uniforms and getting fired from the squad in order to re-start the audition process every year is WILD.)
The show presents evidence of how the DCC is a profit center that contributes millions to the cowboys organization, which makes their $22k yearly pay and lack of resources even more appalling. NFL players have a minimum salary of over $700k for a job that wrecks their bodies. The cheerleaders need the same.
Yes to this. I think it’s interesting to contrast their pay to someone like the Rockettes, who, although they may not make a livable wage solely from that job, do receive (to my knowledge) year round health benefits. Would love someone who knows more about the above - I’ve gotten most of my info from other forums rather from the source.
I watched this show with zero context — I was born and raised in NYC, my family was not into football, so I no understanding the kind of impact the DCC had across American culture in the years I grew up. I basically had no baggage about this franchise, which made the show even more interesting and there were certainly moments where I felt like a scientist looking at a strange insect through a magnifying glass and wondering about it with awe.
Re: Reese and that she's appropriating a certain idea of femininity/sexiness, I actually think it's the opposite. That she IS wilder or sexier, but somehow through growing up in the environment she was raised in, she was told to tamp it down. The one place she actually gets to be herself is when dancing; but otherwise, her religion and the people around her tell her it's bad. (She kept referencing she had a lot of body image issues growing up and that's how she found religion, but I wonder if "body image" issues is just a catch all for something broader.) I just don't think someone who is so good at dancing and movement the way she is is only performing. IMO, it's easy to tell when someone is performing sexiness through regurgitating what they've been told is sexy, but Reese didn't look like that.
Anyway, point is — all I kept thinking while watching Reese is that she may be someone who eventually gets crushed by religion one day because maybe she'll realize a lot of core tenets her of religiosity suppresses a lot of her. I hope it doesn't! Because she seems like a really sweet person.
Yeah, I was UNPREPARED for her dance. She's such a stereotypically "good girl" and then she had the most genuinely sexy dance in the auditions.
And I'm sorry, but Will? WTH. I know couples often don't "match" but I think she ended up with him because it was a self-fulfilling prophecy that she wanted to meet her husband without *gasp* dating around.
I am a yes/and on the Will thing. He seems like he might be a genuinely kind and caring guy, and SO often women who look and behave like Reece end up with complete a-holes who abuse them in one or more ways. I have so many feelings about them, it’s complicated, but I just find it kind of refreshing that he doesn’t seem to be a POS.
Yes, he seems like a nice person. But he's also literally the first person she ever went on a date with and I just wonder how much is genuine love/attraction and how much is ending up with the first person who seemed fine to go out with, you know?
I also could not get past her saying she was scared to date. Like she picked him so she wouldn't have to date more, because dating is scarier than getting married? Why was she scared? Because of trauma? Because of her own sexuality? Like what's going on there??
Totally. She has nothing to compare it to. Could be getting bad or small dick and wouldn't know otherwise. I think they'll split in their 30's and that's when she'll be able to truly discover herself
This was sad to me — I grew up in the evangelical church, and you're made to feel so afraid of that part of yourself. I think Amy has it right that Reece is deeply sexual, but probably not comfortable with that part of herself. When she dances, she can finally be free. TBH that's kind of beautiful.
Hmm maybe I missed what you were trying to say, but being a good dancer doesn’t seem to have much to do with your inner feelings about sex. (I don’t know what you mean by being “sexier” and “wilder.”) “I just don’t think someone who is so good at dancing and moving the way she is is only performing.” <quizzical face>
Being a good performer IS about being convincing in what you’re doing, whether or not that’s how you actually are or feel. Would we say actors who are gay and do straight sex scenes in movies must actually be a little bit straight or they wouldn’t be so convincing? No.
We can respect someone’s dancing as good and not presume personality traits because of it.
I think, whether dancing or acting, you have to be able to tap into some genuine connection and/or emotion when you're performing. To be really great, you have to be able to lose yourself (even temporarily) in the piece. I say this as someone who danced, although I wasn't as good as Reece.
There are lots of technically great dancers, but that doesn't mean all of them can pull off all kinds of dances. It's just interesting that someone as immersed in purity culture as Reece (who I think said she has literally never had a guy touch her) is summoning up those performances. I don't know what that means.
I think there’s a lot of wires crossing here. We have no way of knowing how Reece feels about sex from her dancing. I take issue with people declaring she must *feel* sexy when she dances like that or that she is in some way “wild?” What does “wild” even mean? This is a weird projection and not fair to Reece. Being immersed in purity culture doesn’t make one any less sexual than not being immersed in it. Purity culture limits your sexual agency not your sexuality.
Being a dancer (or a stripper or an actor or a playboy bunny or a porn star) does not make you “wilder” or “sexier” than people who do not do these things, regardless of how well you convince others of your performance.
I think we need to be careful to not make judgments about how someone might feel or not feel about a thing as personal as sexuality based on something they do or wear. What this sounds like to me is “she dances that way so she must be wild internally” which is waaayyy too close to “she deserves it” and strips her of her sexual agency just as much as purity culture.
'What this sounds like to me is “she dances that way so she must be wild internally” which is waaayyy too close to “she deserves it” and strips her of her sexual agency just as much as purity culture.'
That wasn't my interpretation of what was said.
However, I would absolutely argue that purity culture DOES limit both your sexual agency and your sexuality. That was my lived experience. Others might have different experiences.
That’s interesting and I would be curious in what ways it limited your sexuality. I’m not an expert on sexuality, but I define that term to be your innate, personal experience as a sexual (or asexual) being. I use the term to mean one’s internal experience in regard to sex, which is different from the external conditions that create one’s sexual image.
I also grew up in purity culture and I understood from an early age that what I desired sexually was different than what I was allowed to desire sexually. I don’t know a lot about this though, so if anyone does I’d love to hear leading theories. Maybe a convo for another thread!
Ooooh, this is such a good take. As someone who grew up in the South, I think this is how it really is. There is an expectation of conformity and any aberration from that will be swiftly crushed, papered over, discouraged etc bc down there folks, at least who I grew up around, are very subscribed to the idea that if you don’t fit into that mold it will reduce your life prospects (for your life as they envision it). A lot of it IMO is that there’s a script for women with a few different paths but all ending in an ideal of being married and either working a pink collar job or being a homemaker from a fairly young age. There isn’t space for women to have ambition.
Yup. I grew up in the evangelical south thinking that I was unattractive because I didn't do femininity like the women around me. I have curly hair (in a time when straight-irons were ubiquitous), I don't wear makeup, I'm brunette (soooooooooooo many women dye their hair blonde here), I have zero interest in wearing sexy clothes. I never got any kind of admiring attention from other girls or romantic attention from guys.
Then I moved to the Pacific Northwest and started getting attention and it was very weird for me. (Turned out I didn't want that attention, but that's another story.) I realized, looking back, that a lot of the most popular girls in my high school and at college were conventionally no better looking than me (I realize "conventionally" is doing a lot of work there!) but they were so much better at performing the incredibly narrow form of acceptable femininity than I was. They knew how to present themselves as Women in a way that I absolutely did not.
Of course, I ended up realizing I was asexual and queer and that I didn't want kids, so it all turned out alright for me in the end. But it was a weird journey.
You've helped me finally explain why men treated me so differently in high school versus college. I also did not fit southern femininity standards. I did not really understand them and didn't have an interest in performing them. Someone even told me "you would be pretty if you knew how to dress."
However in college, I received a lot more attention despite not dressing any differently (also queer and had a lot of mixed feelings about this). My school was still in the south but it had a lot of out-of-state students plus a unique culture where traditional southern femininity wasn't expected of everyone.
I remember reading a Seventeen magazine article when I was a tween (so 1980s?) that profiled a gorgeous Southern teen who got up at 5am to do her hair and makeup for two hours every morning before school.
I was like, well, I guess I'll never look as good as she does.
When I worked in the South, in my job I would see women who had literally given birth a few days before, who had barely slept, who were having significant issues feeding their babies, and before their appointments they had mustered the energy and will to apply more makeup than I wore at my own wedding. (Granted, I did not wear very much makeup at my own wedding, but that just further illustrated to me the gap between growing up in a hippie town in upstate NY, and growing up in some of these white Southern cultures.) It is just not acceptable in some places for women to go outside without makeup, and amazing to see how people internalized that so strongly.
I'm glad it helped! It was never something I could articulate until I moved far away and suddenly was interpreted in a completely different way. Looking back I had some friends who were GORGEOUS but who were totally overlooked because they didn't do southern femininity! It was wild!
It is funny, when I was reading your comment/reply to a comment I was thinking about a book I am reading "The Lioness of Boston" about Isabella Stewart Gardner. She is literally shunned by the Boston elite because she did not fit the mold of what a woman who had money in Boston was supposed to be like. Some things never change. I am watching my niece try and become an "influencer" (which I hate but I love her so I support her while also trying to redirect her) and it is also the same. There is a prescription of how women are supposed to look and behave if they want X, Y, or Z and it is ALWAYS very unattainable to most of women.
I agree with you about Reece. In the way the show was presented, she appeared to be the most natural dancer. She looked like she was actually feeling and interpreting the music, rather than just replicating moves. That's something you either have or don't have.
Reminds me of another young woman from the south back in the day who struggled with purity standards [drumroll]: Britney Spears. Be sexy, but don’t want sex.
Great perspective, Amy. Podcaster Kate Kennedy did an episode on America’s Sweethearts as well, and mentioned her upbringing in Evangelical churches during the 90s and early aughts. Paraphrasing, but essentially girls were told to cover their bodies and not dress provocatively less they cause boys to sin, rather than teaching boys to behave well and letting girls dress however the hell they want.
Fueling. What an incredibly polite and clean code word for like… eating food.
These women should have a nutritionist, meals prepared for them, and a trainer to balance strength and yoga and cardio for them. That could all be done in a way that keeps them healthy, “fueled”, strong, AND they can still look lean and toned and amazing in their booty shorts (different body types would be lovely, but lean and toned is the requirement for DCC).
I don’t remember the show coming with a warning about Disordered Eating, but it absolutely should have. The recommendation to watch is going around my circle of friends who were former dancers, but everyone is warning one another about the coded messages around eating. Honestly, it’s rekindled some things that I need to work on with my therapist. But I’m also still glad that I watched it.
You're a machine, you're a robot, you're here as part of the factory that churns out consumable femininity. You aren't a person with emotional needs and with community relationships that might be nurtured around a table.
I'm British, we don't have cheerleaders in football, we don't have anything like them, unless you count a bunch of top less blokes with the letters of their team's name painted on their beer bellies. I am fascinated by this weird Puritan/over sexualised dichotomy. It's so weird to me.
The power dynamic! This is what I’ve been trying to wrap my head around and reading this really helped me get there. There is a phenomenon (present in a lot of places, but here I’m focusing on the way it plays out in rural America and especially in the South) where it’s somewhat shameful to be a powerful woman. I didn’t experience anything close to this in my early childhood so when I encountered it later as a teenager I was absolutely baffled. I had been taught to aim high and to expect financial success for myself. I grew up expecting to work hard and be rewarded and respected. Then we moved into a rural area and I switched schools, and suddenly I experienced a part of the rural Midwest where people speak with a southern accents and wave confederate flags. It was a culture shock for several reasons but the thing that blew my mind the most was the way that these girls were SO OBSESSED with Dallas cowboy cheerleaders and playboy bunnies. One of them in particular loved to tell everyone about how after graduation she was going to road trip to LA to go “try out” for a spot as a playboy bunny. I could NOT figure this out. I could not understand why anyone would aspire to that, and I especially could not square it with the rampant purity culture and the widespread obsession with avoiding the label of slut. This piece really speaks to it, though, and how the DCC/playboy bunny role gives certain women (1) a kind of cultural permission to act sexy without experiencing a loss of worth due to being seen as too sexual (a slut), and (2) a level of status and power that are otherwise shamed and seen as un-feminine among people of that subculture.
I got into Making the Team (the CMT show) back when my older child was born. I’d lay on the bed and nurse her and watch mindless TV like that and KUWTK. That child is now about to be a senior in HS, so that was a long time ago! And what struck me so much about the documentary is that very little had changed. As far as I could tell, the only thing was that the audition process was more whittled down because instead of everyone trying out in person for the initial cuts, now they ask people to send in videos and they make the initial cuts from them and then invite people to audition in person. The year my daughter was born a friend of my younger sister’s tried out and made it on camera a few times. I also remember a woman who was some kind of PhD and was traveling around the country doing research with her husband when she decided to fulfill her dream of trying out. In respect to the change in audition formats, I’m grateful that we see the people after the initial cuts; a lot of the footage from the CMT shows that covered auditions seemed about creating a contrast between the women who looked like they’d move on versus the ones you could tell would not (like the aforementioned PhD).
I’ve never aspired to be a cheerleader and dropped out of rush at an SEC school, so to me watching something like this or Bama rush Tok feels more like a glimpse into a life I didn’t choose for myself, but, as a southern woman, I also recognize in women I know. It’s like watching a documentary on Republicans: I know enough of the archetypes that it all is familiar while also so far away from anything resembling my life. Along those lines, another thing that stuck out to me was the short snippet about the girl from NJ who Reece said was excited about seeing plastic bags at stores. I live in DE, where plastic bags are also banned from certain stores, and that offhand comment contained multitudes—particularly if you think about the other contrasts between a state like Texas and NJ, like the fact that if a DCC were to have an unintended pregnancy during the season they’d have a much harder time accessing abortion care now than they would have a few years ago.
And maybe that’s the thing that ultimately leaves me reeling. It’s Texas! They’re flocking to Texas, where the legislators and courts and governor are so blase about women's lives that they shrug about women dying! Is it worth it?
The plastic bag comment was so MAGA, very "THE DEMS DON'T WANT YOU TO HAVE PLASTIC BAGS!!" (I don't think she intended it FULLY that way, but very much in line with that strain of thinking)
The plastic bag scene reminded me of a time in undergrad. This was 2003 in San Antonio. A new professor had just moved there after living in CA, WA, and Hong Kong. They said, “I was surprised to find you still use styrofoam here.” I thought, “oh no, you’re in for a wild ride.”
The plastic bag thing was weird, like they were somehow being deprived of plastic bags?
Maybe it's because I recycle them in those bag drops when I get them, but I appreciate not having to accumulate mounds of plastic bags in my house before I take them in!
Yes, it's a tiny bit of a pain to keep a cloth bag in my bag but it really hasn't made a difference in my life.
It can be a huge pain when you go to a place like Target, especially if you’re “grocery” shopping because it’s easy to forget to bring the bags in, but I haven’t found it changes my habits much; I just keep a ton of bags in the car. I do appreciate the ease of a plastic bag for trash in the car, but it’s not an inconvenience to not have them around.
I felt her plastic bag comment in the depths of my soul! I live in the Seattle area and very much NOT MAGA, but I will bring plastic grocery bags home with me when I travel outside of the PNW. The cheap flimsy ones are so useful as dog poop bags and bathroom trash can liners!
I always feel like a hypocrite when I order a milkshake in a place I know will give me a plastic straw. I love a good vanilla milkshake but can't stand trying to drink one with a disintegrating paper straw
I couldn’t have less in common with the women on this show or the values that DCC represents, but I notice that much of the analysis of the show also objectifies these women by not acknowledging the possibility that they might actually enjoy participating in this AND be perfectly aware of the power structures and sociocultural norms pervading this institution. Are some of these women helpless, unwitting victims of a misogynistic environment who deserve our pity? Absolutely. Are some of these women making a very deliberate and wide-eyed choice to participate in this because it’s what they want at all costs? Also yes, and I wish we could hear directly from those women (whatever judgments some of us may have about that choice).
Perhaps that’s something that they can explore more in S2, but I also felt like the women were discouraged from questioning power structures and authority. Victoria took a year off to work on herself and undergo therapy and it seemed like she was punished for seeking answers or input from outside of the organization. My take was that the only acceptable power structures were everyone reporting up to Jerry Jones and a very evangelical form of Christianity.
I think the Sounds Like a Cult podcast does a great job breaking down some of the hierarchies and social structures within the Cowboys organization. In particular, the “yes ma’am” of it all, and the fact that the women are kept so busy supporting themselves with other jobs while working themselves physically and emotionally to the core, doesn’t allow for a lot of time for deep reflection. But two things can also be true, they could be completely aware and still love it. I think it was Jada, following Sophy’s assault, that had some really poignant comments about being reduced while wearing the uniform.
I think that’s definitely right - I imagine speaking critically about the organization would be grounds for expulsion for current members, but I’d love to hear from past members who are able to be more candid about their experience (whether in the series itself or in reporting about the series).
I totally agree, a lot of the analysis and comments here are incredibly judgmental of these women. A lot of the cheerleaders (like Reese) know exactly what they are doing by being a part of this organization. I think the documentary does a good job at taking the women and their craft seriously.
As someone who did do NFL Cheerleading (albeit in the mid aughts, although not much has changed) I guarantee these women know what they’re doing. They also know you can’t say you know - that’s not how the game is played. The bigger question (which I have no answer for, because it’s probably personal and also rhetorical) is “do they have a responsibility to not “play the game” to themselves or others? Basically, at what point are you complicit in perpetuating misogyny and sexism?
When I cheered, I knew I was catering to a male gaze. Some of that fed my 24 year old ego. Some of it grossed me out. I also knew the best part of cheering for me were the practices (which felt like an aerobics class where the moves were way more fun). I also knew that every time my coach pulled us into the circle to “voluntarily” pray together she was probably mildly breaking the law! And I also knew that I was sure as shit gonna bow my head and pretend to be super into it because I knew deep down the reason I was on that team was, in this order: 1. Because I had a thin, fit body and a decently pretty face, 2. I could dance pretty well and 3. I didn’t make trouble for the coach.
These women are fully formed adults who know what they’re doing, know what this is really about, and know that the only way to get along is to keep up the ruse. By the way, they all came up in this dance culture. This isn’t new to them.
I think that if they know exactly what they're getting into and actively *want*, I pity them even more. Because it reflects acceptance (and by association, support) of prohibitively strict beauty standards, subordination of one's own needs and feelings, and the belief that your value is defined by how appealing you can make yourself to a male audience. There are other settings in which to indulge one's love of dance, and to find sisterhood and community, without being picked apart by Boomer women who can scarcely be troubled to veil their contempt for you. It is all very, very sad.
I’m don’t think these women need our pity. Sure they exist in a patriarchal system. But they are also athletes. One cheerleader even says in the show that she doesn’t do it for men, but for herself.
OK. I don't pity them because they "need" it. Even if they're athletes who participate voluntarily, the cost of being a DCC is to work two jobs, be regularly and casually demeaned by your "coaches," and be forced to alter your physical appearance in ways that are inconvenient and expensive at best, and physically and psychologically harmful at worst. This is what you have to endure to practice your sport/art at the most elite level? Of course I pity them -- that truly sucks.
One of the most heartbreaking and hardest gut-punch moments for me was near the end when Victoria casually mentions that her dad never went to a single one of her dance performances before she joined DCC. Training from childhood the way she has means how many hundreds of dance shows? That her dad could NEVER be bothered to attend?
And the way it was kind of an aside, a casual remark, just summed up all the gross patriarchy/gender stuff for me. Just devastating that she's never experienced real parental support in this pursuit that has been a singular focus of her life, that dance only matters if its in service of this very narrowly-defined, short-term, pursuit.
Reece's rookie buds Charly and Kelly from New Jersey both just made the team on their second try. From my memory of the old show I think that's a common trajectory for dancers who were from CA or the Northeast--it took a full extra year of training and makeup lessons, basically, to match the southern and Utah girls.
That was something I was picking up on - it seemed like there was a surprising amount of women who would try out, get rejected, and then just like, stick around or come back the next year to try to make the team again, and it seemed like this often actually did work. But the idea of putting my life on hold for that long for a team that offers minimal tangible benefits and has all these ridiculous requirements was shocking to me! The way that they must all be supported by their families or just be living on the edge (or both?) was so wild and so sad to me
Yeah, definitely supported by their families. There are specific prep classes/dance schools that have developed over the years owned by former DCC who take them in and give them a year of dance training, essentially. I'm sure there's constant communication between the alumni teachers and K/J about the different women.
Some thoughts on the JUMP SPLITS as someone who has done a variation of them (albeit not in DCC). My high school dance team did a kickline and the jump splits. This video’s from about a decade after I graduated, but stylistically is very similar to what I did: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cwp3x8GjtYg (kickline at 3:18, jump splits roughly a minute later at 4:19). My dissertation:
-Just as everyone has a dominant hand, everyone has a dominant or “good” leg for the splits. One leg is just naturally more flexible than the other (take a moment and test for yourself haha). Even at my strongest and most flexible, I couldn’t fathom doing a jump splits with my “bad” leg. Shudder. Over three+ years of doing this style dancing, it was roughly 50/50 Right vs Left for the girls on my team doing the splits. The fact that DCC requires all the women to use their right leg while doing the splits (see AHP’s argument about conformity) is probably exacerbating injuries. Would you require major league pitchers to all use the same arm? It’s asinine to me.
-Jump splits were an “illegal” move in MN state high school dance competitions in 2000 - nearly 25 years ago. Why? Probably because they didn’t want teens unnecessarily injuring themselves for the sake of something looking cool and the risk is more than the reward.
-DCC remaining “hooked up” with their arms entwined in the kickline increases the chance of injury because the women can catch or brace themselves with their own hands. Instead they’re using their hips to stabilize. Shudder.
-Our high school dance team differentiated true jump splits as “flings” and what’s pictured above as “flicks,” the latter being significantly safer as one catches oneself before sliding into the splits. While my dance team was similarly steeped in tradition (there are some unnerving parallels with DCC), I know that they made a change for safety at a minimum, eleven years ago, if not more. It’s a shame DCC isn’t willing to do the same.
Slightly random fact- the Gaylord Texan where the girls stay during tryouts is WILD. I was there for a work conference a few months ago and it is one of those places where you can go days (weeks?) walking 10,000 steps a day to get around the hotel without experience any fresh air or any natural light. I have to wonder how that affects their mental state during the tryout process (thinking ala the Bachelor)
I haven't been but this feels like all of Dallas — nothing but concrete and sky where everyone is trying to stay indoors in very opulent and convenient strip malls
I live in Dallas now but I've come here to visit my in-laws since the 1990s and they took me out there for the Christmas "ice sculpture show" one year early on. That place is NUTS. Even for Dallas, it's nuts.
I am so busy at work right now, but I have SO MANY MANY THOUGHTS. I won’t have time to get them all down. But please, ask me anything and I will respond as soon as I can!
I am 17 years removed from my stint as an NFL Cheerleader and so much of what you have written is spot on. That said, a lot of these women really do love to dance and the dance part is actually very challenging! Former college cheerleaders do not tryout for NFL squads because they don’t have the dance skills. I minored in classical dance in college and I still was one of the weaker dancers on the team.
Absolutely do not wish to diminish the dance part of the equation — it's just not the type of dance that electrifies me *personally* (and I also think the styles of dance most of them do outside of pom/cheer are more difficult, like Reese and ballroom or Charlie in what seems to be a sort of modern/jazz?)
I was a little disappointed with this piece and some of the comments here. Please read Aubrey's comment below, they express my feelings well. I feel like there is a lot of unnecessary gawking and even objectification of these women for living a lifestyle so different from our own instead of taking them seriously. Sure, they may be raised to value a certain type of femininity. And the Cowboys mistreat the cheerleaders by not paying them well or providing them with great resources. But all of them (including Reese) joined this organization for a reason. Perhaps you delve more into this in the podcast.
Is analyzing how objectification works onscreen and ideologically the same as engaging in objectification? I see them very differently.
I felt the same way
I agree. I grew up in Texas, and although I have a LOT to criticize about this culture, I feel really uncomfortable by the outside liberal gaze here. I'm still sitting with my split and complicated feelings, and may not articulate them well. So apologies in advance.
I worry that a lot of these criticisms are stemming from a place of cultural/religious bias first and foremost. These women are athletes and artists who have found a way to do what they love for PAY on a very high level for as long as possible. Do I have issues with the patriarchy and capitalism under which they are functioning? Yes of course. That's why I left. And I think it's worth our criticism. But I see a lot of criticisms on this thread that are just cultural eyerolls and judgments based on little information dressed up in fancy words. Would we have the same criticisms over ballerinas? Over WNBA players? Any other female led athletic or artistic endeavor that is physically demanding and also requires a discipline around diet and exercise either for the aesthetics or the athletic skills needed to play at the highest level? The jump splits are INSANE, but they are also really cool, and probably thrilling to do, and doesn't every sport fuck up your body somehow?
I have to admit, my first judgment of the costume fitting is the same, because yes I think it's perpetuates body image issues in women of COURSE. But, so do ballet, and gymnastics. And every single working actress I know who orders a salad instead of a burger and gets up at 5am for her barre class. Right? Ack it's so complicated.
It's also making me think of the incredibly smart, powerful women I grew up with in Texas who are religious and family/community centered, and often feel very ostracized by modern liberal feminism, even though they themselves want to be able to address the patriarchy within their cultures. When we approach a lot of very smart young women and begin with the eye roll first, (They're "EVANGELICAL" They "ACT SEXY BUT DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT SEX" (Um. What. Says who.) and THEN start to pat ourselves on the back because "Look! I found empathy for a religious person!" I worry.
I have a lot of anger towards evangelicals and purity culture. But I also know a lot of evangelicals who have been in long term monogamous relationships and who seem very sexually...happy? Satisfied? Who really love their partners and enjoy their physical relationship? I'm not in the bedroom with them, but I think it's weird that we assume sex with more people somehow leads to better quality of sex.
Okay, ramble over.
I grew up in Evangelical culture, in a place that's even more red than Texas. I was a cheerleader and loved it and deeply involved in the church and also loved it. I also lived in Texas for four years. I don't think these women are "bad" — I think, like a lot of women I grew up around and a lot of women I love, they are inculcated in ideologies that understand them, their bodies, and their purpose in incredibly narrow ways. Of course each of these women negotiate their own placement within those ideologies, and we see that onscreen. Women who want to do something exhilarating and athletic shouldn't have to accept the framework of only being able to do what you love if you're willing to put up with a whole bunch of patriarchal bullshit.
Hm. I agree that this particular culture has a lot to criticize, and rage against, but I think framing these college educated women as victims who have all been brainwashed and don’t know any better is condescending. (And I love your work! This is just pushing some buttons for me that I’m still figuring out for myself about a lot of the women I grew up with).
I probably disagree with many of these women on their social and political views, but I don’t know if that means I’m less inculcated than they are?
Some of them will probably look back at this chapter of their life someday as fucked up, and some will continue to cherish it, and some of them need therapy.
I would love to live in a world where the NFL doesn’t exist, much less DCC, BUT there’s a general “Oh these poor poor dumb women.” attitude in a lot of these messages that I side eye.
Amazing! I'd love to know more about the economics: while I wasn't surprised, the idea that the cheer squads are underpaid was a stark reminder that certain forms of labor and expertise and undervalued: particularly if they are performed by women. In your time in the NFL, were there any stirrings on squads to lobby for better pay and benefits?
Would also love to know what inspired you to audition, how being an NFL Cheerleader has influenced your view of the NFL, what it was like to apply your classical training to the squad dance routines, and what the relationships you formed with your cheer-peers look like today.
Many thanks.
Thanks for the interest!
Re: pay and benefits. The NFL has been sued multiple times for violating wage laws since I cheered. Some NFL teams chose to disband their cheerleaders rather than pay them minimum wage! (People often do not realize not all NFL teams have cheerleaders. The cheerleaders are usually employed under the marketing department in NFL team operations, and some teams choose not to have them.)
When I cheered in 2007 we were paid $50 for games (which were 10 hour days). We practiced uncompensated for 8 hours per week and were required to do workouts on our own time on top of practices. We did many charity appearances that were unpaid (average about 2 per week). We had a sponsorship from a beer company that paid $50 per appearance, but those were not as frequent. Other than that we were provided “free” hair and makeup services and free tanning (ew). Those were touted as “enough” compensation, even though we were required to look a certain way and would not have been able to fulfill those requirements without the hair, makeup and tanning services. The team recognized the low pay was not enough to live on and they did not want us to be homeless and they didn’t provide health insurance, so we were required to have a full time job or be a full time student or mother to be on the squad. (We did have on full time mom of two on the team.). They didn’t really mean this, however, as we learned when halfway through the season one of the girls admitted she had dropped out of school secretly and therefore wasn’t meeting the requirement. She was given a pass (likely because she was one of the best looking girls and never had a weight issue).
We were told over and over it was a privilege to even be on the team, the NFL team could cut the whole squad at any time, you were just lucky to be there. This was objectively true, as the Bills ended up cutting their cheerleading team when they were sued over back wages. Also, we saw the hundreds of women who showed up for auditions every year and knew that our spot on a team of 35 was very precarious! If I didn’t want to work for a pittance, there were 300 women being sent home who would!
My classical dancing translated just fine to the NFL because dance is dance and classical training will set you up for a lot. What didn’t translate as well was my body type was more ballet-based. I was lithe and I was told multiple times I need more “shape.” That sounds like they mean boobs, but what they meant was six pack abs and defined arms. The boobs always took care of themselves with generous padding!
As far as the relationships formed, I struggled with forming close friendships because it was very stressful holding down a full time professional job (I was an accountant) and keeping up with all the practices, appearances, workouts, maintaining my weight (we had a range) and the aesthetic required (so much spray tanning!) and still have a social life. I am still friendly with most of the women I cheered with but we were never close friends. I think I was an anomaly in this regard as I chose to only cheer one year (for the reason AHP stayed at the beginning of this piece - I needed it to not become my identity) and I was one of a few women who had a serious full time career. Others had jobs waitressing or in retail that allowed a lot more flexibility and were maybe not quite as “full time.”
Anyway! Thank you for asking. This was one year of my life, but it is probably still one of the most defining things of my life, even though I have tried hard to not make it that way. I’m a lawyer now and I look at that experience in hindsight with a much different perspective. At the time I loved having an outlet to dance three times a week, and it’s definitely a cool story to tell people. Would I do it again? Probably. Would I encourage my daughters to do it? Probably not.
Thanks so much for sharing! Do you have a sense of NBA dancers are in a similar situation pay and responsibility wise? I've always wondered because I think the NBA dancers are amazing.
There was a LOT of crossover on my NFL team with NBA dancers. Many women had done both plus a third professional cheer time, such as LaCrosse. I have no idea what it’s like now, and certainly as a *league* the NBA telegraphs being more progressive than the NFL. I don’t know if that is true in practice or not with regard to how they treat their dancers.
Thank you for sharing so candidly! These are the kinds of issues a more/at all critical angle might’ve addressed.
Sorry to have not responded sooner—I very much appreciate your response!
I loved the shot of the kickline through the years at the end of the series; you can see how the technique has progressed over the years (although I noticed some bent knees at the beginning of their kicks which could be a function of lack of strength, training, or those damn cowboy boots). It’s a shame that the choreography hasn’t kept up with the talent. Of note, former classically trained dancer who also did kickline and pom in high school; not just speaking out of my butt. Haha
I wish we could also talk about the joy and pleasure these women get from their dancing. I went into the show expecting to hate watch it and was surprised to find how much these women just genuinely love dance — a field that's very narrow and hard to get into with very few opportunities to perform on a stage the size of a football field.
The women were incredibly smart while also being compassionate and supportive towards one another, an unusual storyline on a reality show about beautiful, competitive women. There were so many scenes of them helping one another out, cheering each other and supporting each other when someone got cut. It was so tender and it surprised me.
I think what they are sad about losing of course is the fading power of idealized female beauty, but also the companionship and passion of having achieved mastery in their field — an activity that recently has been shown as a more successful treatment of depression than some medications (maybe this has something to do with why they love it so much)
I would love a take that explores why we don't dance culturally anymore and why dance has been pushed aside as a feminine wile instead of a community generating, joyful thing to do and behold.
Another thought… professional dance is either elite and upper class, an art form reserved for those who can "appreciate it," working in entertainment most often in a supporting role or as a choreographer or as a dance educator. Not everyone feels comfortable in those spaces and the DCC (and the laker girls, etc) are decidedly more mainstream.
it's tempting to look down our noses at their taste and where they want to be, but maybe we should be careful about assuming they don't know their own minds and are acting and choosing this very brief (powerful, fun, community rich) opportunity purely because they've been trained by culture to do so.
I gather that dance is considered an acceptable outlet for young women in Texas. Look at Friday Night Lights, the television series, which had the three major young female characters each with her own dance interest. One was a cheerleader. One was a rally girl, possibly a more rambunctious sort of cheerleader. One was doing modern dance. I have some friends who grew up in Texas. She was a majorette, a practitioner of yet another kind of dance. He was in the Pershing Rifles, on the drill team. Since it involved guns, it was a form of dance suitable for boys.
Restrictive religious cultures often encourage dance as an outlet. For example, Salt Lake City is noted for its ballet company and other dance companies as well.
Totally agree with this! My sister is a dancer in possibly the least male gaze-y/sexualized form of dance (highland dance), and still faces a lot of the emotions that it seems these women face (from reading the piece, I haven't seen the show). Yes, these women may be told that their worth in terms of physical appearance will decline, but there is also the fact that generally speaking your body simply cannot sustain dancing on a high level beyond your 20s. When both self-worth and true love and passion are derived from a sport, having to face this inevitable decline is incredibly difficult and heartbreaking. I thought Challengers did an excellent job of showing this heartbreak through Zendaya's character, Tashi Duncan, and I think it's something that is not unique to dance but is perhaps exacerbated in dance by a lack of opportunities to pursue dance in the same way as you grow older—both due to the physical constraints of the body, and because there are fewer opportunities to take classes and perform in the same way.
YES! dance is a short career. Everyone knows ballet destroys your feet and creates eating disorders and is not welcoming if you’re not white and I’m pretty sure doesn’t exactly pay well.
Even so most ballerinas are broken hearted when they can’t continue and after watching these women, I was left feeling like what mattered to most of them above all was how they feel when they dance together and perform.
I think it’s a bit classist to pity the DCC as hapless victims of misogyny because they have long hair and do sexy dances in Barbie makeup.
after watching the show it certainly wasn’t my impression that these women were blowing their hips out so men would think they mattered.
A high school boy we knew - he's grown up now - joined the cheerleading squad as a mascot because he liked the way the cheerleaders stuck up for each other.
YES!! Dancing is so JOYFUL. I grew up in the '90s in a conservative evangelical household when swing dancing was popular — having a local dance hall to go to every Friday night with my friends was a defining feature of how I was able to socialize with boys without an over protective parent hovering nearby. It was pure joy — my boyfriend (the first boy who ever flirted with me) and his friends and my friends would meet there every friday and dance our hearts out. EVERYONE danced together — it wasn't sexual, it was physically exhilarating and it bonded us together deeply in a way that no other teen activity could. I loved how it made me feel desirable and girlish and so fully in my body — don't know how I would have gotten through high school without dance and I miss it to this day.
I have many thoughts, but one thing that stood out to me in this series was how unnecessarily hard the powers that be were making an already difficult thing for the DCC, aside from the laughable pay and ankle-wrecking cowboy boots. The endless unpaid hours spent doing elaborate hair and makeup for practices - why? In the summer, in Dallas! Your uniform is minutely fitted to you but you don't get to keep it as a souvenir after you retire. Their bus driver wasn't given security clearance for their own stadium grounds so had to defend his right to be there. It felt like contempt, like they constantly had to be reminded to not get too big for their britches (or booty shorts). I'm not American and didn't grow up in this culture, but I know that there's no way the Cowboys would have anywhere near the following they have without the DCC. It's like they can't be lifted up without being torn down, which I guess is the subtext of so much of this great analysis.
Yes. Especially with the “fueling yourself” topic as they are shamed for being two lbs over their uniform measurements but the team doesn’t even provide them dinners prepared by a professional who could ensure they were properly nourished for the energy expenditure of evening practices, as well as game days. Or send them home after practice with pre-made breakfast and lunch for the next day. The fact that they are losing sleep trying to do their own meal prep late at night while then being disciplined when they can’t kick perfectly the next day is insane. It makes the Jones family look like villains.
I didn't even think of this, but it's so true! It's like the Cowboys organization has figured out how to get maximum value - financial, reputational and cultural - while expending less than the bare minimum. The message is 'You're lucky to be here, there are a million 'girls' who can take your place, now show us how grateful you are.'
So well said, Aliana! They want DCC to be these elite athletes yet the women aren’t provided with a team nutritionist, physical trainers (I saw a few ankles being taped, but these women weren’t by and large being worked over by PTs), or mental health professionals. After Sophy’s groped DURING A GAME, Kelce (the cheerleader who was stalked a whose car was air tagged), clearly looks triggered. Yet, there’s no professional support offered. Also, how in a stadium which boasts 3k televisions, is there no feed on the cheerleaders?! It makes me furious.
Full disclosure that I am a fan of a rival football team, but the Jones family are absolutely villains. They don't even need to work hard at it, and at some point it seems like they're actually going out of their way to be as vile as possible just because they can.
Jerry’s comment about “loyalty” being the most important thing to him was a moment. That’s mob boss talk.
As a lifelong Dallasite, Jerry Jones is the villain to us too. I know my dad has never forgiven him for firing Jimmy Johnson in the same way he's never forgiven Jane Fonda for that picture in Vietnam.
Something that blew my mind was that the women from out of town who made it to the final round were staying in that big hotel but didn’t get to eat breakfast. I think it was Charlie who was like, I just really want some eggs.
I thought the same thing! Why didn’t she get eggs?! 😂
They stayed at the Gaylord Convention center. It's a massive, beautiful center. I would hope that their meals were comped
I would hope so too! I was just basing it on what the girls were saying about wanting proper breakfast and the collection of protein bars and fruit and stuff in their rooms.
The hair and makeup expectations are the most Southern part of the show. I grew up in Tennessee and it is absolutely expected that you have your hair done and makeup on for everything. It's a class thing. Being sweaty or having your hair messy? Were you raised in a barn? Don't you dare embarrass your mother by leaving the house looking unkempt! For my family who really did grow up in a trailer park, it was EVEN more important to always have your hair and make up done.
From the age of 13, I never left the house without mascara and brows done as a bare minimum, even for workouts. Until the pandemic. That's almost 30 years of doing my face before leaving the house.
Yeah, I was well into college (as an athlete, no less!) before I ever left the house without hair and face done
Contempt, and a reminder that they don't actually have any power or control. It's to make them "grateful"--you're being "given" this. But simultaneously, you have to work nonstop to "earn" it.
I know, I would be a sweatball but all their hair looked great all the time.
The fact that it's unattainable or difficult to attain is part of the class part. Also why the AC is cranked so high everywhere
Truly. It’s freezing inside most places May-September.
I will say that I believe that WHAT AM I … ? page also had the word "Courtesy" at the top and it was explaining what courtesy is, although I also thought initially that it was about the DCC members themselves.
It's still a bit weird and feels like it was written in the 1950s. Speaking of which, my mom was a flight attendant in the Catch Me If You Can era and her handbook felt similar. Be pretty! But also don't look slutty or fat! (They were weighed every week.)
What I loved about the show is how kind the women (I wrote "girls" and corrected myself) were to each other, despite being competitors. I believe it was genuine and I appreciated that this didn't have the usual "I'm not here to make friends" vibe of reality shows. They were, in fact, here to make friends because they were mostly sacrificing everything else to be here.
Victoria broke my heart. She seems so lively and sweet but just so...sad. It's like the DCC broke her but I'm rooting for her.
And aallll the coaches' criticism of the perfectly lovely redhead's (Charlie?) face made me want to scream. They talked like she was some hideous creature sometimes.
Don't even get me started on Charlotte Jones' little speech about pay. I told my daughter that if you substituted "football" in for "dance" in that speech and suggested no one get paid because they love football so much, men would lose their minds.
And of course, so few women of color were chosen.
VICTORIA! No one deserves to feel that way about themselves and I am sure that whatever has created that mindset for her goes way deeper than her wanting redemption through the DCC. And Charlotte Jones can get fucked. And the racism!!
I was so glad Victoria ended up retiring.
ack I haven't finished the season but I'm happy for her, she deserves to find her own way
Oh I’m so sorry for spoiling! 😬😬😬 my bad
omg no worries!
Yes, thank you, I was going to say this as well because it was a misinterpretation in the original Atlantic article that is (understandably!) being repeated here. It's a very 1950's-ish explanation of what "courtesy" is as a virtue. Would they ideally like the DCC members to be sexy AI assistants, no question they do, but there is not actually a page in the handbook telling them to be "a little thing with big meaning".
Thanks for flagging the "courtesy" conclusion of the quote--that was also my understanding, but I'm having trouble tracing back to *where* I saw it. But I think the a distinction between answering the "what am I" question with "courtesy" rather than "a DCC " is an important one.
I think it was meant to be a cutesy kind of riddle of a definition, with "Courtesy" asking "What am I?" but the fact that we're all so confused says something.
I froze the frame to take a look but my interpretation could be wrong. Maybe it's posted somewhere.
Agree. The confusion also tells us something about ourselves--I could completely believe that am organization like DCC would say something like that to these athletes.
Agreed!
The NCAA was just recently forced to start paying the football players at the heart of the multibillion dollar college football industry. Of course, doing well at college football might get a player a lucrative slot in an NFL team.
Until very recently, college football...
I saw this show as a masterclass in how to exploit and control women, financially and otherwise. The DCC leaders (who may not even realize the extent to which they are complicit in exploiting their cheerleaders — a whole other topic!) have created a system where these women must exhaust themselves (physically, financially…) to attain a semblance of societal power that is then taken away from them every single year. (The whole thing about turning in their uniforms and getting fired from the squad in order to re-start the audition process every year is WILD.)
The show presents evidence of how the DCC is a profit center that contributes millions to the cowboys organization, which makes their $22k yearly pay and lack of resources even more appalling. NFL players have a minimum salary of over $700k for a job that wrecks their bodies. The cheerleaders need the same.
Yes to this. I think it’s interesting to contrast their pay to someone like the Rockettes, who, although they may not make a livable wage solely from that job, do receive (to my knowledge) year round health benefits. Would love someone who knows more about the above - I’ve gotten most of my info from other forums rather from the source.
They'd do even worse except NYC is still something of a union town.
I watched this show with zero context — I was born and raised in NYC, my family was not into football, so I no understanding the kind of impact the DCC had across American culture in the years I grew up. I basically had no baggage about this franchise, which made the show even more interesting and there were certainly moments where I felt like a scientist looking at a strange insect through a magnifying glass and wondering about it with awe.
Re: Reese and that she's appropriating a certain idea of femininity/sexiness, I actually think it's the opposite. That she IS wilder or sexier, but somehow through growing up in the environment she was raised in, she was told to tamp it down. The one place she actually gets to be herself is when dancing; but otherwise, her religion and the people around her tell her it's bad. (She kept referencing she had a lot of body image issues growing up and that's how she found religion, but I wonder if "body image" issues is just a catch all for something broader.) I just don't think someone who is so good at dancing and movement the way she is is only performing. IMO, it's easy to tell when someone is performing sexiness through regurgitating what they've been told is sexy, but Reese didn't look like that.
Anyway, point is — all I kept thinking while watching Reese is that she may be someone who eventually gets crushed by religion one day because maybe she'll realize a lot of core tenets her of religiosity suppresses a lot of her. I hope it doesn't! Because she seems like a really sweet person.
Yeah, I was UNPREPARED for her dance. She's such a stereotypically "good girl" and then she had the most genuinely sexy dance in the auditions.
And I'm sorry, but Will? WTH. I know couples often don't "match" but I think she ended up with him because it was a self-fulfilling prophecy that she wanted to meet her husband without *gasp* dating around.
I am a yes/and on the Will thing. He seems like he might be a genuinely kind and caring guy, and SO often women who look and behave like Reece end up with complete a-holes who abuse them in one or more ways. I have so many feelings about them, it’s complicated, but I just find it kind of refreshing that he doesn’t seem to be a POS.
Yes, he seems like a nice person. But he's also literally the first person she ever went on a date with and I just wonder how much is genuine love/attraction and how much is ending up with the first person who seemed fine to go out with, you know?
That said, I hope they continue to be happy.
I also could not get past her saying she was scared to date. Like she picked him so she wouldn't have to date more, because dating is scarier than getting married? Why was she scared? Because of trauma? Because of her own sexuality? Like what's going on there??
Totally. She has nothing to compare it to. Could be getting bad or small dick and wouldn't know otherwise. I think they'll split in their 30's and that's when she'll be able to truly discover herself
omg I love this. And Reece does seem to be just a lovely kind person with a big heart.
This was sad to me — I grew up in the evangelical church, and you're made to feel so afraid of that part of yourself. I think Amy has it right that Reece is deeply sexual, but probably not comfortable with that part of herself. When she dances, she can finally be free. TBH that's kind of beautiful.
Thank you for saying it. We are all thinking it
Hmm maybe I missed what you were trying to say, but being a good dancer doesn’t seem to have much to do with your inner feelings about sex. (I don’t know what you mean by being “sexier” and “wilder.”) “I just don’t think someone who is so good at dancing and moving the way she is is only performing.” <quizzical face>
Being a good performer IS about being convincing in what you’re doing, whether or not that’s how you actually are or feel. Would we say actors who are gay and do straight sex scenes in movies must actually be a little bit straight or they wouldn’t be so convincing? No.
We can respect someone’s dancing as good and not presume personality traits because of it.
I think, whether dancing or acting, you have to be able to tap into some genuine connection and/or emotion when you're performing. To be really great, you have to be able to lose yourself (even temporarily) in the piece. I say this as someone who danced, although I wasn't as good as Reece.
There are lots of technically great dancers, but that doesn't mean all of them can pull off all kinds of dances. It's just interesting that someone as immersed in purity culture as Reece (who I think said she has literally never had a guy touch her) is summoning up those performances. I don't know what that means.
I think there’s a lot of wires crossing here. We have no way of knowing how Reece feels about sex from her dancing. I take issue with people declaring she must *feel* sexy when she dances like that or that she is in some way “wild?” What does “wild” even mean? This is a weird projection and not fair to Reece. Being immersed in purity culture doesn’t make one any less sexual than not being immersed in it. Purity culture limits your sexual agency not your sexuality.
Being a dancer (or a stripper or an actor or a playboy bunny or a porn star) does not make you “wilder” or “sexier” than people who do not do these things, regardless of how well you convince others of your performance.
I think we need to be careful to not make judgments about how someone might feel or not feel about a thing as personal as sexuality based on something they do or wear. What this sounds like to me is “she dances that way so she must be wild internally” which is waaayyy too close to “she deserves it” and strips her of her sexual agency just as much as purity culture.
'What this sounds like to me is “she dances that way so she must be wild internally” which is waaayyy too close to “she deserves it” and strips her of her sexual agency just as much as purity culture.'
That wasn't my interpretation of what was said.
However, I would absolutely argue that purity culture DOES limit both your sexual agency and your sexuality. That was my lived experience. Others might have different experiences.
That’s interesting and I would be curious in what ways it limited your sexuality. I’m not an expert on sexuality, but I define that term to be your innate, personal experience as a sexual (or asexual) being. I use the term to mean one’s internal experience in regard to sex, which is different from the external conditions that create one’s sexual image.
I also grew up in purity culture and I understood from an early age that what I desired sexually was different than what I was allowed to desire sexually. I don’t know a lot about this though, so if anyone does I’d love to hear leading theories. Maybe a convo for another thread!
It's a lot to go into and it's kind of painful but I'm glad you had a different experience. A friend of mine is writing a book on this topic.
Yeah, that's totally fair! And I appreciate you noting that.
Ooooh, this is such a good take. As someone who grew up in the South, I think this is how it really is. There is an expectation of conformity and any aberration from that will be swiftly crushed, papered over, discouraged etc bc down there folks, at least who I grew up around, are very subscribed to the idea that if you don’t fit into that mold it will reduce your life prospects (for your life as they envision it). A lot of it IMO is that there’s a script for women with a few different paths but all ending in an ideal of being married and either working a pink collar job or being a homemaker from a fairly young age. There isn’t space for women to have ambition.
Yup. I grew up in the evangelical south thinking that I was unattractive because I didn't do femininity like the women around me. I have curly hair (in a time when straight-irons were ubiquitous), I don't wear makeup, I'm brunette (soooooooooooo many women dye their hair blonde here), I have zero interest in wearing sexy clothes. I never got any kind of admiring attention from other girls or romantic attention from guys.
Then I moved to the Pacific Northwest and started getting attention and it was very weird for me. (Turned out I didn't want that attention, but that's another story.) I realized, looking back, that a lot of the most popular girls in my high school and at college were conventionally no better looking than me (I realize "conventionally" is doing a lot of work there!) but they were so much better at performing the incredibly narrow form of acceptable femininity than I was. They knew how to present themselves as Women in a way that I absolutely did not.
Of course, I ended up realizing I was asexual and queer and that I didn't want kids, so it all turned out alright for me in the end. But it was a weird journey.
You've helped me finally explain why men treated me so differently in high school versus college. I also did not fit southern femininity standards. I did not really understand them and didn't have an interest in performing them. Someone even told me "you would be pretty if you knew how to dress."
However in college, I received a lot more attention despite not dressing any differently (also queer and had a lot of mixed feelings about this). My school was still in the south but it had a lot of out-of-state students plus a unique culture where traditional southern femininity wasn't expected of everyone.
I remember reading a Seventeen magazine article when I was a tween (so 1980s?) that profiled a gorgeous Southern teen who got up at 5am to do her hair and makeup for two hours every morning before school.
I was like, well, I guess I'll never look as good as she does.
When I worked in the South, in my job I would see women who had literally given birth a few days before, who had barely slept, who were having significant issues feeding their babies, and before their appointments they had mustered the energy and will to apply more makeup than I wore at my own wedding. (Granted, I did not wear very much makeup at my own wedding, but that just further illustrated to me the gap between growing up in a hippie town in upstate NY, and growing up in some of these white Southern cultures.) It is just not acceptable in some places for women to go outside without makeup, and amazing to see how people internalized that so strongly.
I'm glad it helped! It was never something I could articulate until I moved far away and suddenly was interpreted in a completely different way. Looking back I had some friends who were GORGEOUS but who were totally overlooked because they didn't do southern femininity! It was wild!
It is funny, when I was reading your comment/reply to a comment I was thinking about a book I am reading "The Lioness of Boston" about Isabella Stewart Gardner. She is literally shunned by the Boston elite because she did not fit the mold of what a woman who had money in Boston was supposed to be like. Some things never change. I am watching my niece try and become an "influencer" (which I hate but I love her so I support her while also trying to redirect her) and it is also the same. There is a prescription of how women are supposed to look and behave if they want X, Y, or Z and it is ALWAYS very unattainable to most of women.
I agree with you about Reece. In the way the show was presented, she appeared to be the most natural dancer. She looked like she was actually feeling and interpreting the music, rather than just replicating moves. That's something you either have or don't have.
Reminds me of another young woman from the south back in the day who struggled with purity standards [drumroll]: Britney Spears. Be sexy, but don’t want sex.
Great perspective, Amy. Podcaster Kate Kennedy did an episode on America’s Sweethearts as well, and mentioned her upbringing in Evangelical churches during the 90s and early aughts. Paraphrasing, but essentially girls were told to cover their bodies and not dress provocatively less they cause boys to sin, rather than teaching boys to behave well and letting girls dress however the hell they want.
AHP, I would devour another essay or two covering any of those other other topics you’re dying to discuss. This doc was EVERYTHING
Fueling. What an incredibly polite and clean code word for like… eating food.
These women should have a nutritionist, meals prepared for them, and a trainer to balance strength and yoga and cardio for them. That could all be done in a way that keeps them healthy, “fueled”, strong, AND they can still look lean and toned and amazing in their booty shorts (different body types would be lovely, but lean and toned is the requirement for DCC).
Agree wholeheartedly, Jen M.
I don’t remember the show coming with a warning about Disordered Eating, but it absolutely should have. The recommendation to watch is going around my circle of friends who were former dancers, but everyone is warning one another about the coded messages around eating. Honestly, it’s rekindled some things that I need to work on with my therapist. But I’m also still glad that I watched it.
You're a machine, you're a robot, you're here as part of the factory that churns out consumable femininity. You aren't a person with emotional needs and with community relationships that might be nurtured around a table.
I'm British, we don't have cheerleaders in football, we don't have anything like them, unless you count a bunch of top less blokes with the letters of their team's name painted on their beer bellies. I am fascinated by this weird Puritan/over sexualised dichotomy. It's so weird to me.
LOL, yeah, the British sent their weirdest over here and now we’re stuck with it!
But... do those blokes do the high kick? (Just kidding. The image makes me giggle.)
God, I hope not. That would be terrifying.
The power dynamic! This is what I’ve been trying to wrap my head around and reading this really helped me get there. There is a phenomenon (present in a lot of places, but here I’m focusing on the way it plays out in rural America and especially in the South) where it’s somewhat shameful to be a powerful woman. I didn’t experience anything close to this in my early childhood so when I encountered it later as a teenager I was absolutely baffled. I had been taught to aim high and to expect financial success for myself. I grew up expecting to work hard and be rewarded and respected. Then we moved into a rural area and I switched schools, and suddenly I experienced a part of the rural Midwest where people speak with a southern accents and wave confederate flags. It was a culture shock for several reasons but the thing that blew my mind the most was the way that these girls were SO OBSESSED with Dallas cowboy cheerleaders and playboy bunnies. One of them in particular loved to tell everyone about how after graduation she was going to road trip to LA to go “try out” for a spot as a playboy bunny. I could NOT figure this out. I could not understand why anyone would aspire to that, and I especially could not square it with the rampant purity culture and the widespread obsession with avoiding the label of slut. This piece really speaks to it, though, and how the DCC/playboy bunny role gives certain women (1) a kind of cultural permission to act sexy without experiencing a loss of worth due to being seen as too sexual (a slut), and (2) a level of status and power that are otherwise shamed and seen as un-feminine among people of that subculture.
I got into Making the Team (the CMT show) back when my older child was born. I’d lay on the bed and nurse her and watch mindless TV like that and KUWTK. That child is now about to be a senior in HS, so that was a long time ago! And what struck me so much about the documentary is that very little had changed. As far as I could tell, the only thing was that the audition process was more whittled down because instead of everyone trying out in person for the initial cuts, now they ask people to send in videos and they make the initial cuts from them and then invite people to audition in person. The year my daughter was born a friend of my younger sister’s tried out and made it on camera a few times. I also remember a woman who was some kind of PhD and was traveling around the country doing research with her husband when she decided to fulfill her dream of trying out. In respect to the change in audition formats, I’m grateful that we see the people after the initial cuts; a lot of the footage from the CMT shows that covered auditions seemed about creating a contrast between the women who looked like they’d move on versus the ones you could tell would not (like the aforementioned PhD).
I’ve never aspired to be a cheerleader and dropped out of rush at an SEC school, so to me watching something like this or Bama rush Tok feels more like a glimpse into a life I didn’t choose for myself, but, as a southern woman, I also recognize in women I know. It’s like watching a documentary on Republicans: I know enough of the archetypes that it all is familiar while also so far away from anything resembling my life. Along those lines, another thing that stuck out to me was the short snippet about the girl from NJ who Reece said was excited about seeing plastic bags at stores. I live in DE, where plastic bags are also banned from certain stores, and that offhand comment contained multitudes—particularly if you think about the other contrasts between a state like Texas and NJ, like the fact that if a DCC were to have an unintended pregnancy during the season they’d have a much harder time accessing abortion care now than they would have a few years ago.
And maybe that’s the thing that ultimately leaves me reeling. It’s Texas! They’re flocking to Texas, where the legislators and courts and governor are so blase about women's lives that they shrug about women dying! Is it worth it?
The plastic bag comment was so MAGA, very "THE DEMS DON'T WANT YOU TO HAVE PLASTIC BAGS!!" (I don't think she intended it FULLY that way, but very much in line with that strain of thinking)
The plastic bag scene reminded me of a time in undergrad. This was 2003 in San Antonio. A new professor had just moved there after living in CA, WA, and Hong Kong. They said, “I was surprised to find you still use styrofoam here.” I thought, “oh no, you’re in for a wild ride.”
The plastic bag thing was weird, like they were somehow being deprived of plastic bags?
Maybe it's because I recycle them in those bag drops when I get them, but I appreciate not having to accumulate mounds of plastic bags in my house before I take them in!
Yes, it's a tiny bit of a pain to keep a cloth bag in my bag but it really hasn't made a difference in my life.
It can be a huge pain when you go to a place like Target, especially if you’re “grocery” shopping because it’s easy to forget to bring the bags in, but I haven’t found it changes my habits much; I just keep a ton of bags in the car. I do appreciate the ease of a plastic bag for trash in the car, but it’s not an inconvenience to not have them around.
Where I am, if you don't have a reusable bag, they just give you a paper bag (which I think costs 5 cents but am not totally sure).
I felt her plastic bag comment in the depths of my soul! I live in the Seattle area and very much NOT MAGA, but I will bring plastic grocery bags home with me when I travel outside of the PNW. The cheap flimsy ones are so useful as dog poop bags and bathroom trash can liners!
Same here. Totally support plastic bag bans but also covet them for the reuse possibilities.
I always feel like a hypocrite when I order a milkshake in a place I know will give me a plastic straw. I love a good vanilla milkshake but can't stand trying to drink one with a disintegrating paper straw
I couldn’t have less in common with the women on this show or the values that DCC represents, but I notice that much of the analysis of the show also objectifies these women by not acknowledging the possibility that they might actually enjoy participating in this AND be perfectly aware of the power structures and sociocultural norms pervading this institution. Are some of these women helpless, unwitting victims of a misogynistic environment who deserve our pity? Absolutely. Are some of these women making a very deliberate and wide-eyed choice to participate in this because it’s what they want at all costs? Also yes, and I wish we could hear directly from those women (whatever judgments some of us may have about that choice).
Perhaps that’s something that they can explore more in S2, but I also felt like the women were discouraged from questioning power structures and authority. Victoria took a year off to work on herself and undergo therapy and it seemed like she was punished for seeking answers or input from outside of the organization. My take was that the only acceptable power structures were everyone reporting up to Jerry Jones and a very evangelical form of Christianity.
I think the Sounds Like a Cult podcast does a great job breaking down some of the hierarchies and social structures within the Cowboys organization. In particular, the “yes ma’am” of it all, and the fact that the women are kept so busy supporting themselves with other jobs while working themselves physically and emotionally to the core, doesn’t allow for a lot of time for deep reflection. But two things can also be true, they could be completely aware and still love it. I think it was Jada, following Sophy’s assault, that had some really poignant comments about being reduced while wearing the uniform.
I think that’s definitely right - I imagine speaking critically about the organization would be grounds for expulsion for current members, but I’d love to hear from past members who are able to be more candid about their experience (whether in the series itself or in reporting about the series).
I totally agree, a lot of the analysis and comments here are incredibly judgmental of these women. A lot of the cheerleaders (like Reese) know exactly what they are doing by being a part of this organization. I think the documentary does a good job at taking the women and their craft seriously.
As someone who did do NFL Cheerleading (albeit in the mid aughts, although not much has changed) I guarantee these women know what they’re doing. They also know you can’t say you know - that’s not how the game is played. The bigger question (which I have no answer for, because it’s probably personal and also rhetorical) is “do they have a responsibility to not “play the game” to themselves or others? Basically, at what point are you complicit in perpetuating misogyny and sexism?
When I cheered, I knew I was catering to a male gaze. Some of that fed my 24 year old ego. Some of it grossed me out. I also knew the best part of cheering for me were the practices (which felt like an aerobics class where the moves were way more fun). I also knew that every time my coach pulled us into the circle to “voluntarily” pray together she was probably mildly breaking the law! And I also knew that I was sure as shit gonna bow my head and pretend to be super into it because I knew deep down the reason I was on that team was, in this order: 1. Because I had a thin, fit body and a decently pretty face, 2. I could dance pretty well and 3. I didn’t make trouble for the coach.
These women are fully formed adults who know what they’re doing, know what this is really about, and know that the only way to get along is to keep up the ruse. By the way, they all came up in this dance culture. This isn’t new to them.
Thanks for sharing your experience!
I think that if they know exactly what they're getting into and actively *want*, I pity them even more. Because it reflects acceptance (and by association, support) of prohibitively strict beauty standards, subordination of one's own needs and feelings, and the belief that your value is defined by how appealing you can make yourself to a male audience. There are other settings in which to indulge one's love of dance, and to find sisterhood and community, without being picked apart by Boomer women who can scarcely be troubled to veil their contempt for you. It is all very, very sad.
I’m don’t think these women need our pity. Sure they exist in a patriarchal system. But they are also athletes. One cheerleader even says in the show that she doesn’t do it for men, but for herself.
OK. I don't pity them because they "need" it. Even if they're athletes who participate voluntarily, the cost of being a DCC is to work two jobs, be regularly and casually demeaned by your "coaches," and be forced to alter your physical appearance in ways that are inconvenient and expensive at best, and physically and psychologically harmful at worst. This is what you have to endure to practice your sport/art at the most elite level? Of course I pity them -- that truly sucks.
One of the most heartbreaking and hardest gut-punch moments for me was near the end when Victoria casually mentions that her dad never went to a single one of her dance performances before she joined DCC. Training from childhood the way she has means how many hundreds of dance shows? That her dad could NEVER be bothered to attend?
And the way it was kind of an aside, a casual remark, just summed up all the gross patriarchy/gender stuff for me. Just devastating that she's never experienced real parental support in this pursuit that has been a singular focus of her life, that dance only matters if its in service of this very narrowly-defined, short-term, pursuit.
I agree; that was devastating!
I was invested in Victoria and so angry for her that she’s been told and shown such bullshit all her life.
Yeah, that was so sad! Also like, fuck her mom for allowing that to happen!
But mostly fuck her dad!
Reece's rookie buds Charly and Kelly from New Jersey both just made the team on their second try. From my memory of the old show I think that's a common trajectory for dancers who were from CA or the Northeast--it took a full extra year of training and makeup lessons, basically, to match the southern and Utah girls.
That was something I was picking up on - it seemed like there was a surprising amount of women who would try out, get rejected, and then just like, stick around or come back the next year to try to make the team again, and it seemed like this often actually did work. But the idea of putting my life on hold for that long for a team that offers minimal tangible benefits and has all these ridiculous requirements was shocking to me! The way that they must all be supported by their families or just be living on the edge (or both?) was so wild and so sad to me
Yeah, definitely supported by their families. There are specific prep classes/dance schools that have developed over the years owned by former DCC who take them in and give them a year of dance training, essentially. I'm sure there's constant communication between the alumni teachers and K/J about the different women.
Oh wow, that is fascinating. Yet another way this process is monetized...
Some thoughts on the JUMP SPLITS as someone who has done a variation of them (albeit not in DCC). My high school dance team did a kickline and the jump splits. This video’s from about a decade after I graduated, but stylistically is very similar to what I did: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cwp3x8GjtYg (kickline at 3:18, jump splits roughly a minute later at 4:19). My dissertation:
-Just as everyone has a dominant hand, everyone has a dominant or “good” leg for the splits. One leg is just naturally more flexible than the other (take a moment and test for yourself haha). Even at my strongest and most flexible, I couldn’t fathom doing a jump splits with my “bad” leg. Shudder. Over three+ years of doing this style dancing, it was roughly 50/50 Right vs Left for the girls on my team doing the splits. The fact that DCC requires all the women to use their right leg while doing the splits (see AHP’s argument about conformity) is probably exacerbating injuries. Would you require major league pitchers to all use the same arm? It’s asinine to me.
-Jump splits were an “illegal” move in MN state high school dance competitions in 2000 - nearly 25 years ago. Why? Probably because they didn’t want teens unnecessarily injuring themselves for the sake of something looking cool and the risk is more than the reward.
-DCC remaining “hooked up” with their arms entwined in the kickline increases the chance of injury because the women can catch or brace themselves with their own hands. Instead they’re using their hips to stabilize. Shudder.
-Our high school dance team differentiated true jump splits as “flings” and what’s pictured above as “flicks,” the latter being significantly safer as one catches oneself before sliding into the splits. While my dance team was similarly steeped in tradition (there are some unnerving parallels with DCC), I know that they made a change for safety at a minimum, eleven years ago, if not more. It’s a shame DCC isn’t willing to do the same.
Ok I have to say that final kick line where it had some Irish dancing in it was MEZMERIZING!
Slightly random fact- the Gaylord Texan where the girls stay during tryouts is WILD. I was there for a work conference a few months ago and it is one of those places where you can go days (weeks?) walking 10,000 steps a day to get around the hotel without experience any fresh air or any natural light. I have to wonder how that affects their mental state during the tryout process (thinking ala the Bachelor)
I haven't been but this feels like all of Dallas — nothing but concrete and sky where everyone is trying to stay indoors in very opulent and convenient strip malls
I live in Dallas now but I've come here to visit my in-laws since the 1990s and they took me out there for the Christmas "ice sculpture show" one year early on. That place is NUTS. Even for Dallas, it's nuts.
Hear that Ginger. The Gaylord is the Disney World of Dallas.
They're all like that tbh. I've been to the Gaylord Nashville and the one in DC for work stuff. It's basically an indoor version of Disney Springs.
"It's basically an indoor version of Disney Springs."
So, my nightmare.
And terrible linens and pillows