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Amy's avatar

This made me cry, a lot. I'm a queer person constantly trying to reckon with my experiences growing up religiously. I'm 38, have been married (once to a man and now to a non-binary AFAB human) and I am STILL grappling with how sex works and makes me feel and undoing all the shame of it all. And it never hit me before that the trauma IS the point -- it explains why I am constantly feeling like I am failing and ruined and bad, no matter what I do or how I work through things. Thanks for saying things I've found hard to put into words.

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Amanda's avatar

Thanks for so perfectly capturing what it’s like to grow up female in the evangelical church. It took years of deconstructing to get me to a healthier place, but I still resent how much shame I carry around. It’s not healthy or fair to compare, and everyone is fighting their own battle — yet damn, what must it be like to not be raised to think your own body is sinful and undeserving of pleasure (until a man validates your sexual identity by marrying you)? Happy to see young people of faith changing the narrative.

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